In a rare burst of ideological purity, the All Progressives Congress (APC) has announced that governors defecting into its warm, overcrowded embrace will not be issued automatic tickets no VIP pass, no express lane, no complimentary re-election voucher.
This revelation came as a mild shock to a political class long accustomed to treating party platforms like commercial buses: flag one down when convenient, hop in with luggage, and demand the front seat. But the APC, ever eager to remind Nigerians that it is “democratic and progressive,” has insisted that even governors must queue politely, of course behind the party’s constitution, which is occasionally dusted and read aloud during interviews.
According to party insiders, defection does not magically translate into candidacy. In simpler terms: changing jerseys mid-match does not guarantee you’ll captain the team. Governors Umo Eno, Agbu Kefas, Siminalayi Fubara, and others have reportedly been advised to bring more than just their resignation letters.
Achievements, popularity, and the goodwill of party members those elusive things are now required.
The APC Director of Publicity went further to reassure Nigerians that not even the President enjoys automatic privilege. This was said with the solemnity of a school principal declaring that the head prefect must still write exams. A vote of confidence, yes. Automatic ticket, no. Democracy, after all, must be seen to be doing press interviews.
Opposition parties, watching from the sidelines, wasted no time shouting, “We told you so.” The PDP described the defectors’ journey as the beginning of regret, while the NNPP likened the APC to a political mirage, promising water in the desert, then offering sand and a rulebook after you arrive.
Critics argue that many defections are less about ideology and more about political insurance. The APC disagrees, attributing the influx to President Tinubu’s “numerous achievements” and the irresistible glow of the Renewed Hope Agenda. Nigerians, meanwhile, are left to wonder whether hope now comes with a registration form and internal party screening.
In Kano, anticipation hangs thick in the air as party leaders hint that another governor may soon cross over. The welcome mat is ready. The automatic ticket machine, however, remains firmly unplugged.
For now, the APC’s message is clear: everyone is equal especially after joining. Tickets will be contested, ambitions will be tested, and democracy will be loudly proclaimed. Whether the process ends in consensus, contest, or quiet disappointment is another matter entirely.
In Nigerian politics, defections may be swift, promises may be sweet, but one thing is now official: in the APC, crowns are not issued at the gate. You still have to fight for them inside.
